This is one whacky franchise. No really. Think about it.
The billionaire owner is thinking of running for President (or Prime Minister) of a country that still has nuclear weapons pointed at the city where he wants to move his team. The power forward, that softie, has given a $2 million engagement ring to a reality TV star while the sixth man is watching his fiancee' (who's richer and more popular than his teammate's girlfriend) tear through the European tennis world. The kid center is at a comic book convention in Phoenix with his twin brother. Their new billion dollar arena has been likened to a serpent or snake...Nets to play in the "Belly of the Brooklyn Beast"! Can Yormark market that? Please. Then, there's the rapper who the team officially calls a "global icon" and his wife. Whoosh, we say.
The wedding of Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian will take place at the end of July or the beginning of August, says "an insider", quoted by Extra! It will be like a "royal wedding", one of her sisters tells E! and oh yes, like the engagement with the rose petals, it will be televised, says the always reliable Glamour!! No doubt so will the honeymoon, a safari in South Africa, reports gossip maven Perez Hilton!!! When they come back, she will be Kim Humphries!!!! "Keeping up with the Humphries"? So says TMZ and if you can't trust TMZ... According to some reports, she may be pregnant.!!!!! Gawker reports "the child is expected to be of average height and made entirely of diamonds. (Think 'sparkly Michelin man.)" She denies it to Access Hollywood, one of our trusted sources. Access also called her a "vixen."
Keeping a lower profile (who in this world isn't?!), Sasha Vujacic has spent most of his summer getting a tan in the stands of various European tennis venues, watching his fiancee' (ring value: $250,000), Maria Sharapova, mow down opponents, first at the Italian Open and now at the French Open. Her comeback won't be complete though till she wins at Roland Garros in Paris and then returns to the All-England Lawn Tennis Club at Wimbeldon. The staid BBC says of Sasha, "he looked on approvingly." That'll never get you attention! Was it him who got her those smashing diamond earrings? The London Telegraph will never tell.
On a loftier note, the Council on Foreign Relations (really) thinks Mikhail Prokhorov is acting as a wedge between the forces of Prime Minister Vladimir Putin and President Dmitry Medvedev. His job "to run a true opposition but as a support structure for Medvedev-ism against Putin-ism". Will it affect missle defense (no, really)?? Sounds dangerous. We wish him well. Foreign Policy Association says not to worry. He was forced to do it. Still sounds dangerous.
Meanwhile, Damion James is home in Nacogdouches, Texas, where he's been rapping on stage with Slim Thug. In comparison, that's tame.